We know that holding on to the pain would not fix anything, replaying the past over and over again will not change it but we still are not able to let go. It’s pretty normal, the problem is we do not know how to let go and free ourselves from the pain, trauma, hatred or regret.
The problem is, when we are holding an old pain, grudge or regret in our heart it becomes a part of our identity and we are not even sure ourselves what we are without our pain. Remember you are not your pain, regret or your past. That’s where letting go will change the whole scenario for you, you will emerge as the person defined by who you want to be, not defined by your past.
When it comes to the past, all what we can do is to accept what happened in past on factual grounds and then instead of holding on to it, just let it go. It might seem impossible but trust me you can do it.
So, today I am going to share with you how to be able to free yourself from what you have been holding on for years.
1. Live in present not the past
One thing I learnt from my yoga instructor years ago, she used to say “Just let go”, sound divine no? But I was very confused how to do it? Then she told me to learn to live in the present. She said living in the present is the best we can do to ourselves, holding on to the past will make us live with regret and living in the future will make us have a gazillion expectations with it. So, the best we can do is to live in the present, eliminating all the regret and expectation will make our mind peaceful and we will be able to divert all our energy and focus to make our present better
2. Learn Forgiveness
Resentment on forgiving will keep you locked in your past and will block you from viewing you present opportunities and blessings. Sometimes it is very difficult for us to forgive someone, but forgiving is more beneficial for you than for the person who is being forgiven. Therapists also use this strategy to cure their patients, the trick is to remember you are not doing it for them; you are doing it for yourself. Being able to let go can be extremely difficult, but it will give you the strength to learn from your mistakes and free yourself to move on in life.
3. Stop being the victim
Being the victim can make you feel good for quite a longer period of time. You will feel pity for yourself and will keep on blaming others for making your life miserable. Every moment gives you a choice to sit there holding your past feeling miserable, or you can get over with what happened in past, let go of the pain and take control of your life there and then.
Why would you let the person who hurt you in the past to still hurt you by sticking to that pain? Learn to let go and free yourself from your haunting past, take responsibility of your happiness!!
4. Don’t live in the Chains when you have the key
Don’t let the self imposed restrictions keep you chained when you have the key. Your problems will not be solved by anyone else; if you are depending on someone to rescue you from your pain you are still living in a fool’s paradise. Learn from your mistakes, the world largely does not care for your happiness. You have to take a step yourself to take control of your life, unchain yourself by letting go.
5. Go easy on yourself
This is an ultimate tip to relax and let go, just go easy on yourself. Expecting too much from yourself can impart self doubt in you, which is yet again a negative emotion you don’t need in your life right now. Just relax a bit take a deep breath and laugh on your mistakes. Laughing at your mistakes does not mean you are not taking you life seriously, just promise yourself you are not going to repeat what happened in past.
6. Accept your ground realities
There are certain factors in your life which you cannot change, but you can accept them for your good. You cannot certainly change your past, but you can make decisions which will help to nurture your future. There is nothing wrong with accepting what happened in your past, if you accept the wrong doings only then you will be able to let go of what happened previously and will focus on your current strengths and ignore the weaknesses.
7. Let go and Detach yourself from external factors
Holding on to possessions, status, money, and people will only bring disappointments; these are all
external factors which are beyond your control. Focus your attention towards internal and deeper
spiritual factors which will sooth your mind and bring calm, serenity and peace. Stop being materialistic and especially stay away from negative people, who judge you on your worldly possessions.
8. Stop worrying what people will say or think
Also read this “Things that keeps you back from success”
Free yourself from being controlled by the opinions of others; if you learn to practice this your whole life will change. We hold on to toxic relationships and make our life messy just because we are fearful of what other people might think or say. Frankly speaking, it just does not MATTER!! Let go of the fear what people will say and witness yourself how your life changes.
Remember you are not what happened to you, you are what you choose to become. Try to let go of
whatever is holding you back to live with a free and conscious mind!! Open your heart and mind to all the blessings and opportunities. Stay blessed